So you lead/are part of a group that meets regularly with the same folks and want to reflect!
Reflecting as a group is crucial for growth, learning, nipping conflict in the bud, and nurturing meaningful connections. Just like individuals and romantic partners reflect to improve themselves and their relationship, groups must engage in reflection to ensure longevity and a positive experience for all members.
I’m hopeful that this becomes a regular practice for crews, guilds, and any sort of recurring group at the Commons, including the Commons itself.
Why?
- To facilitate open communication, understanding, and bonding
- To metabolize small tensions before they escalate into something more painful & difficult
- To prevent problems from festering and causing the group to drift apart
- To celebrate successes, appreciate one another, and reinforce the group's purpose
- Reflection is foundational for self-improvement, whether for individuals or groups
- Agile/Scrum prioritizes retrospectives at the end of each sprint for this reason
What?
There’s all sorts of angles to reflect from/on:
- What we do together
- Nuts and bolts, logistics
- What’s been effective, what’s been effective
- Action items
- How we are together - How has it been to be together?
- How we communicate with each other
- How we (really) feel about each other
- What we love, celebrate, appreciate, are grateful, excited about with each other
- What’s made us confused, angry, sad, jealous, afraid about/with each other, how we’ve hurt each other
- What we can and can’t talk about
- What roles we play in the group
- How we (really) feel about the group as an entity, a 3rd thing
- Who we are together - what has this meant to me?
- What role we play in each others lives
- How we’ve been impacted by the group
- What role the group plays in our lives
- What being part of the group says about me
- How we’ve impacted the group
- What we want in the future
- What we ourselves want
- What we want to do together
- What we want to commit to
- What we can’t commit to
- What we’re saying goodbye to
- How we want to feel
- What role we want to have in each others lives
How?
For this I’ll assume a crew sized group (3-6 people), and add notes at the end to adapt for larger group sizes.
Set aside dedicated time, whether it’s regularly every, say, 6-8 weeks, or just 10-15 minutes at the end of meetings.
A sample agenda: