Humans are emotional beings. Emotions colour the way that we interpret things, whose information or request we will rely on or question and doubt. They affect what we’re capable of doing, how motivated we are to do what. Beside ‘emotions’, we might mention ‘energy’. The word sounds vague, but describes something many of us feel daily, namely the speed at which we’re able to process, the rhythm of things, and the level of motivation we experience.

Shapeshifters pay close attention to the emotions and energy of the people they interact with, and actively put effort in calibrating them. Typically, to increase ease and flow: the capacity to work or interact with less perceived effort and friction, over longer periods of time.

When that emotional and energetic labour is missing, all sorts of problems tend to happen: spiralling misunderstandings, false escalations, or conflict avoidance. Some people will be more guarded, reducing creativity, problem solving, and general enjoyment of things. Others will be more outspoken, responding to (perceived) apathy with (perceived) aggression.

That type of labour is largely feminised, and typically seen as ‘magic’ or ‘personal’. It is, however, something that is done deliberately by shapeshifters, with the following aspects.

• Emotional safe space. When someone is upset, irritated, frustrated, etc, shapeshifters are available to listen confidentially and without judgement, as a sort of ‘in-house therapist’. Often, this is enough for emotional intensity to decrease. This can be particularly valuable for top executives or managers who hold a lot of pressure, and must do a lot of emotional calibration themselves. Shapeshifters help them regulate, to the benefit of all. They act like a balm or painkiller, relieve pressure in the moment, and reduce the risk of reactive decisions or burn out, especially in a ‘crisis’ or ‘rush’.
• Energy calibration in meetings, workshops, and everyday interactions, shapeshifters pay attention to the levels of energy and modulate them, raising or lowering them depending on the context, to counter apathy, aggression or anxiety. They do this by slowing down or accelerating their own speech, gestures, even breathing, tone of voice, or choosing words deliberately intended to soothe or excite. This can be done very deliberately, or ‘happen’ less consciously as a matter of habit.
• Trust repair and maintenance. Shapeshifters understand the mechanics of trust, and what can harm it. They look for points of interpersonal friction, when people have differing styles, cultures, temperaments, and look for ways to compensate. This can be through various one-on-one interventions, reframing what happened, or letting people describe a negative experience and offer a reframe or alternative interpretation. Or it can be by fostering and reflecting on positive interactions that offset friction.
• Emotional role modelling. Shapeshifters are good at regulating their own emotions, and visibly do it. They normalise emotional and energetic language, help others develop vocabulary to describe what is happening and understand themselves. Not only do they foster ‘calm and positivity’, and nurture a sense of care and belonging but they turn emotions into a source of insights for what is happening in the group.

In short, shapeshifters manage the emotional bandwidth of the system – the whole or the parts they can influence, knowing this could have a ripple effect.. They hold what might be called the emotional architecture of a system: the unseen scaffolding that allows collaboration to hold under pressure. This is a “soft skill,” true, but in the same way that we might want – and need – our pillows, bandages and airbags to be soft.